Party Poopers

Alex Marevez says the Manning boys like to rain on other people’s parades

Talk about your party poopers.

First, New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning helped ruin Sunday’s ballyhooed regular-season unveiling of the new Dallas Cowboys Stadium. One night later, his older brother spoiled the fun at the most star-studded home opener in Miami Dolphins history.

Indianapolis quarterback Peyton Manning left J.Lo feeling low, T-Pain writhing in agony and Jimmy Buffett gagging on his margarita. Manning’s 48-yard touchdown pass to Pierre Garcon with 3:18 remaining gave the Colts a 27-23 road victory.

Proclaiming this victory improbable is being kind. Miami was involved in the most notorious choke since Dolphins minority owner Serena Williams threatened to shove a tennis ball down the throat of a U.S. Open line judge. No team has lost while enjoying such a lopsided edge in time of possession — 45:07 to 14:53 — since the NFL began tracking the statistic in the mid-1970s. A poorly executed two-minute drill in the waning moments sealed Miami’s fate.