The Pittsburgh Penguins are a team in need of an identity shift. Sure, they have the big talented top three forwards, and two big centers, but what kind of character is this team really made of? Just last weekend, after Sidney Crosby was either maliciously attacked or lightly brushed upon by Brandon Dubinsky’s stick (depending on who you ask), you knew that there’d be an answer. You knew Dubinsky would have to pay.
You don’t go after one of the best players in the league and get away with it!
That is, unless you do it to a Penguin. Because there was no one lining up to get Dubinsky to step up for his actions. There was no fire, passion, anger from any Penguins players. They just stood back and said, “Yes, Mr. Dubinsky, please have your way with our captain.”
The Pittsburgh Penguins can solve all of their problems with just one little move: trading Evgeni Malkin for David Clarkson.
Sure, the idea may sound crazy at first. The Penguins trading a Calder winner, two-time Art Ross winner, and a Conn Smythe winner for a guy who has scored 15 goals in his last 129 games. But remember, David Clarkson a noted 30 goal scorer as recently as four short years ago, and he has scored 30 while playing in the kind of dull, mundane defensive system that Penguins coach Mike Johnston has installed in Pittsburgh, something Malkin has NEVER done in his one year under Johnston!
But we’re going a bit beyond the numbers here, because the Penguins have players to put up numbers. They need the kinds of guys who have a history of being fantastic teammates. David Clarkson is that kind of guy. He’ll pot you some goals, and if necessary, he’ll do what he can to jump into a ten person scrum to try and pot some fists onto a guy’s face while he’s already down and being covered by a bunch of other people.
We’re not going to stop there, though. We know Clarkson has a history of standing up for teammates, but he’s taken it one step further in the past. He’s willing to throw down for the honor of even the smallest parts of his team: the goalie’s water bottle.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwE6SUZOACo
What Penguins player is going to start fights over a water bottle? Certainly not Evgeni Malkin! That’s a quality that he sorely lacks. He’s probaby too busy leading the league in scoring.
Clarkson is the kind of gritty, character player the Penguins have sorely lacked since losing Tanner Glass a couple of seasons ago, and Clarkson comes with the added benefit of actually being able to shoot a puck, if you give him enough time and space.
Not only do the Penguins get a much-needed infusion of team identity and leadership in a deal like this, but they will also cut considerable space on the cap. Clarkson’s deal, which runs until 2019/20, pays him just $5.25m on the cap, over $4m less than the king’s ransom of $9.5m Malkin will be demanding until 2021/22 – not to mention, Malkin is owed two big $5m bonuses in addition to that salary in those final seasons! That’s not very Team Friendly at all!
I’ve already seen it written that perhaps Eric Staal is a target for Malkin, which is an awful idea. Staal is an over-the-hill one-way forward who hasn’t scored 30 goals since 2010/11 and hasn’t even been involved in the play-offs since 2008/09. That’s not the kind of leadership the Penguins need.
Another ridiculous thing that popped up was a Fanpost on SB Nation’s Battle of California, proposing that Dustin Brown should be on the Penguins radar. Get real! Dustin Brown’s last productive offensive season was in 2007/08, when he scored 33 goals. Brown does have the pedigree of two Stanley Cups to his name, but in that same sense, what else does he have left to play for? He’s got everything he wanted out of hockey, and has a massive contract paying him far too much money, so he can just coast into the sunset, occasionally kneeing a far superior player and potentially ending a career or two. That’s not something to dream on.
While, at first glance, this trade may not seem altogether “fair” for the Penguins, it becomes dramatically more palatable when you factor in all of the finer points. Yes, the Penguins are giving up a bit of scoring prowess in the deal, but with the system and style that Mike Johnston is running, it will hardly be noticed. He can fill in the gaps using the plethora of plugs competent bottom sixers at his disposal, while simultaneously bringing in a player to fill in the largest gap on the team.
The Penguins don’t need a 100 point scorer. Where has that got them? Struggling for continued relevance in the play-off picture! That isn’t going to win Cups! The Penguins need grit. They need toughness. They need character. They need leadership. They need someone to stand up and say, “NO, MR DUBINSKY, YOU MAY NOT TOUCH OUR CAPTAIN IN THAT MANNER.”
David Clarkson is that man.
– Jeremy
Did you realize that this is satire? If not, tweet me @307x, and we’ll discuss this further.
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