Sorry for the delay, I was too busy getting a suit tailored and wedding shopping at Ikea. Big day. Big, big day. Almost didn’t have enough time for everything. Anyway, here are some quick hits on the most recent Vikings news …
Darius Reynaud is definitely running? That’s what he seems to think. Reports came out this week from Darius … am I spelling his name right? Whatever … who said that he has been talked to about moving to running back for the Vikings this season. He would join Adrian Peterson and Albert Young as the main running backs in this offense and excuse me if I don’t say what the hell is going on here. Sure, this sounds like a great idea if you’re running a college team or setting up your Madden playbook, but are you kidding me? All it seems to be doing in the NFL is taking carries/touches/cheers/jersey chasers away from Peterson and Harvin. And is Reynaud even deserving of this? I mean, it’s not like he can crack the four deep on the wide receiver depth chart, and at best he’d be like the 17th option on offense for the Vikings. I don’t see the need to move him to running back. I guess use talent when you got it, but seriously, in the NFL guys like Reynaud are a dime a fucking dozen. This will be short lived.
Childress blows Tebow: In a declaration that will make you want to throttle yourself, Childress told reporters today … or yesterday, I don’t know … that he doesn’t see it as inconceivable that Tim Tebow could change his throwing motion in order to be a successful NFL quarterback. He made the allusion to Aaron Rodgers coming out of Cal and how there was mucho work that was needed on his throwing motion, and I guess besides being a total cock swapper he’s ok. Are these comments by Childress just a little ball tickling to make other teams think that they’d have to reach for Tebow in order to pry him from the Vikings dead hands, or does Childress really like Tebow? As a fan, kind of, our chances are that he probably really likes him and will handicap our quarterback position for several more years. Thanks, you hairless cheeked freak.
Childress called up Favre just “to chat”: Also, I think it was Sid Hartman that reported Childress and Favre played a little love connection over a phone connection last Thursday, presumably just to chat about the budding flowers and spring time showers. They wouldn’t have anything else to discuss, right? Like … maybe if Favre wanted to give a definitive answer on whether or not he wanted to play some ball next year so the Vikings could figure out if they would have to sell their souls for McNabb? Nothing like that? I get damn furious when these jack offs try to make us believe that they didn’t mention one thing about football. Favre probably doesn’t even like Childress. Why would they just talk on the phone? Swapping lemonade recipes? Discussing politics? What films to move up in their NetFlix queue? Dumb. TELL ME WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT FOOTBALL, DAMMIT!
McKinnie is the go to guy in Miami? Eh, I couldn’t make it through this entire interview that some idiot website did to slobber on McKinnies knob, but they talk a bit about how McKinnie is the go to guy for music producers and promoters in the Miami area and then McKinnie sits and poses for a camera looking super uncomfortable and emo. Uh … you can see he uses a Mac by his keyboard design though. So … there’s some info. I will say that at the beginning when the white guy is trying to introduce what’s going on and the camera is kind of pretending that it’s focusing on him but really just making sure that McKinnie is in the shot is pretty funny. Stupid white people. Also, I think this is officially listed as a celebrity blog, so he may write more over there. Obviously not about football though.
Ladainies still confident in ability: Ladainies came out today (not Ricky Martin style) and said that people pay too much attention to stats when they try to assess players, specifically him, and decide whether or not they are still effective. He said that in Whale’s Vagina he was stuck in a system that was 100% pass oriented, with pass blocking offensive linemen, a passing preferred coach, a pass hungry quarterback … all those things which took away from his ability to run the ball effectively. This is great to hear because the Vikings are a terrible running team, so it’s really no surprise that he would go to an offensive system that is the best at the run. And don’t give me whole “passing is the way to win in the NFL!” talk. If that is true than it’s retarded. Passing games suck. LT is a badass if he wants to grind it out on the ground and quite honestly, the Jets do that best. It would have been awesome if he were in purple, really, but whatever.
Goodell wants you to get your ass to a stadium: Your NFL overlord Roger Goodell knows that you prefer to watch NFL games by sitting at home in your stained sweat pants, purple socks with holes in them, eating Funyons and drinking cheap beer in front of your 50 inch Plasma TV. He says this is fucking bullshit and is going to demand that you get your ass into the seats. He’s concerned about fans being “comfortable” but not having the home experience be as “intense”. You know what, Goodell? If going to an NFL game didn’t suck so much balls we’d reconsider. If it didn’t finger bang my checking account, provide me with shitty seats, only allow celebrities to attend Super Bowls, provided better beer selection, and in Minnesota, allowed to watch a game ANYWHERE other than the Metrodome, I’d reconsider. But for now, go to hell.
Cheerleaders can write, too? The Vikings cheerleaders have started to get more interactive now too! I noticed that they, Krisan and Pamelsa (I’m assuming cheerleaders) started blogging about cheerleader activities over at the Star Tribune. Thus far I have been terribly disappointed by the lack of secret locker room photo displays or recounts of celebrity threesomes, but I have to assume those posts are coming. Otherwise, why would you read them? Also, the cheerleaders have popped up on Twitter as well, posting something like once a week, which is pretty weak for a Twitter account. They’ll catch on, I assume. Maybe we should start harassing them there so that we can finally get that interview with a cheerleader. Any help in that department would be splendid.
The best mailbag around: If you don’t consistently read the Kissing Suzy Kolber sex/fantasy football mailbag every Thursday you should probably go over there. I feel really awesome (I just lost all internet relevance right here) by having my question selected this week, so I encourage you to go over there and read it. CAN YOU GUESS WHICH ONE IT IS??? Hint; I’m not the dude with the crazy bitch that lied about losing a baby only to say she had it seven years later. Wow. That guy is in a world of hurt. As an aside, I would still love to do a mailbag here at PJD, but no one seems all that interested. If you ever are inclined to ask a question or provide a tip, email us here. Really. We jump like a track star when our phone buzzes that a new email has come in. It makes our day.
Enjoy the weekend everyone. I’m sure you’re all watching the de-virginizing of Target Field this weekend. I see Cuddyer has struck out a bunch and Morneau looks overrated. It’s going to be a great season!
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