PSaMP’s The National Scoop

Huzzah…PSaMP’s The National Scoop has finally made a comeback. Here’s the original version, if you fell the need to research PSaMP’s TNS’s roots.

A little background, PSaMP’s TNS centers around text message conversations between me and my sports-enthusiast sister, Sheena Beaston. With that being said, please excuse spelling/grammar/capitalization and the like. Stupid texts only give you like 160 characters or whatnot. Bullshit.

This episode came during the Broncos/Bears game and concluded during the Eagles/Patriots game last night.
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Tec: devin hester [is] goin nuts

SB: sauerbrun is gonna have his feet torn off again

Tec: U watchin this game?

SB: no…im conjuring it up in my mind…lol…yes

Tec: Here we go

SB: rex grossman is a chinese precious moments doll

Tec: Haha tim tebow looks exactly like rex

SB: little porcelain twerps

Tec: Haha

Tec: What a catch berrien

SB: devin hester is a fruit

Tec: Sauerbrun is gona get fired lol kr td pr td and blocked punt

SB: brian dawkins needs to decapitate tom brady tonight

Tec: I was just thinkin the same thing. my madden 2000 boy better come up huge

SB: if he knows whats good for him

Tec: Him and his scary ass facemask shield

SB: american gladiators is coming back

Tec: Ya just saw that ad. i have a horrible gut feeling that its gonna suck. like in the later years of the original when they added pyramid

SB: and skytrack

Tec: And snapback

SB: and gauntlet

Tec: And tug o war

SB: or whiplash

Tec: Haha i think thats all of the later additions

SB: there were the mid series ones like hang tough and the wall

Tec: Haha and atlasphere

SB: oh shite…how could we forget swingshot…that one was my jam

Tec: Assault and the other [originals] will always tear at my heatstrings

SB: original eliminator took like 30 secs to complete and then they went and added that stairclimber nonsense in the beginning

Tec: Ya that was in the crazy late episodes. the reverse conveyor belt at the beginning was the best. although the huge red and blue balls were clutch

SB: and then thy added the cargo net…but the balance beam with glads throwing medicine balls was so primitive and suite

Tec: Early mid series with wesley 2 scoops berry was the tightest

Tec: 3:49 left in the first and im already sick of hearinf madden say ‘tom brady’

SB: i know…i also hate the name wes welker

Tec: Unrelated, but i love the name phil pfister, from met rx worlds strongest man

SB: lets go on the amazing race

Tec: Haha no. id rather chill out and take my time at airports rather than lose my mind making spot decisions

SB: i think it would be hilarious

Tec: More or less. i guess id do it

SB: im in love with the eagles right now

Tec: Cool onside kick recovery philly

Tec: Ive grown numb to seeing peyton manning in commercials

SB: i dont even see him in commercials anymore…i erased those rods and cones permanently

Tec: john madden is so fat

SB: aj feely is eating up the pats d for snicky snack

Tec: Aj felly is thinkin hes wearing an orange shirt in miami (reference to when feely beat ne when he was with the fish)

SB: aj feely thinks koy detmer couldnt have thrown that td

Tec: Koy detmer thinks colt brennan couldnt throw that td (reference to brennan breaking ty detmers collegiate td record)

SB: ty detmer thinks he found inspiration in win tested furbee making a start at the ripe old age of 63

Tec: Kent graham is starting to hit the weight room

SB: jim miller was talking to eric crouch about them both coming out of retirement

Tec: tim couch told them they were crazy

SB: tim biakabutuka told them otherwise

Tec: Erric pegram is mulling a comeback

SB: only if jon whitman blocks for him

Tec: John fiala #57 is needed for special teams then

SB: and eric green #86 can haul in passes in the grand tradition of wild ass te’s

Tec: Bam morris can then trade coke for tree with nate newton

SB: jamal lewis can oversee the trafficking…he has the experience

Tec: And if anything goes awry, ray lewis can murder the offender

SB: on that note rae carruth says peace out and im going to bed…ill talk to you tomorrow
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Fun times. Oh what happens when I try to discuss national sports happenings.