NOTE: Before we begin, friendly reminder to peep Danny’s write-up on Dan Marino’s early season struggles. It’s tremendous work, but if he even thinks about coming near my father Mike Matheson, I’ll have no choice but to kill him.
Listen. We do this every year.
The Pens blow some lead in the doldrums of mid-season. Like clockwork, embarrassing “journalists” react like a disappointed father who just caught their son impregnating tonight’s dessert. Shame on you!
Let’s all take a lesson from Mr. Levenstein and cut the boys some slack, shall we?
I’m not saying the Pens didn’t fuck up. Just cannot take your foot off the throat of that team in that spot. They have a stunning ability to sit on their collective thumb instead of covering their own net front.
But it happened, and was probably long overdue considering the Pens have snatched victory from the jaws of defeat about 73 times already this year. Doesn’t feel good when the rabbit has the gun, does it?
Going into the series, you’d take 4 / 6 points. So let’s put another pie in the oven and move the fuck on.
1ST PERIOD
Dumo back on the top pair. Some say that’s good.
Colton Sceviour was out with COVID. His replacement was Nien Nunb from Star Wars, which is a modest upgrade.
Malkin went straight to the box before you could crack your first Coors Light. Killed.
Lafferty continued his awesome stretch of play by dropping a bizarre area pass in the direction of Pettersson who was just coming onto the ice, leading to a Flyers 2-0.
PHI Goal – Konecny (9) A: Laughton [6:08] 1-0 PHI
Rather than show the goal, let’s keep it classy and admire the work of a man on the cusp of becoming a father with his delightful wife. Looking forward to getting #cancelled for saying this.
Travis Konecny announces he will be a dad! pic.twitter.com/TFwHmSlXJi
— Broad Street Buzz (@BroadStreetBuzz) February 27, 2021
That ought to do it for Sam Lafferty.
— Jesse Marshall (@jmarshfof) March 6, 2021
Thanks Jesse – nothing else to say.
Pens went to the power play on the next shift. Through the first 90 seconds, they looked about as threatening as Frank Reynolds and the Yellow Jacket Boys.
Geno recognized this, so he decided to just do it all himself.
PIT Goal (PP) – Malkin (5) A: Crosby, Guentzel [7:54] 1-1
Malkin dropped a stun grenade in the crease on his way by pic.twitter.com/gyNOsA9Fkr
— Spittin' Chiclets (@spittinchiclets) March 6, 2021
Don’t sleep on Sid, who makes an elite pass look routine.
A million penalties ensued for each team, eventually culminating in the Penguins running the tic-tac-toe play on the Peep for a Rust tap-in.
PIT Goal (PP) – Rust (8) A: Crosby, Guentzel [18:01] 2-1 PIT
Can confirm the @penguins are big fans of tic-tac-toe. pic.twitter.com/BYkQgdMXtY
— NHL (@NHL) March 6, 2021
Too bad Geno can’t get a 3rd assist there. Great cross-ice pass to start the sequence.
Pens would take their 38th penalty on a Flyers rush, sending them into intermission shorthanded.
Overall, nice job responding to an early goal and flipping the special teams script for once. Stop taking fucking penalties. Stop it.
2ND PERIOD
Gritty Jr. finally broke through the Pens PK.
PHI Goal (PP) – Hayes (9) A: Provorov, Konecny [1:20] 2-2
Tied again! Kevin Hayes goes upstairs on the power play to even it up. pic.twitter.com/JTWZtLDlJQ
— Broad Street Hockey (@BroadStHockey) March 6, 2021
I’m not really a fan of the Penguins’ consistent lack of high pressure on the PK. Way too much time and space for Hayes to walk in there – nothing Jarry can do. Not sure if I mentioned this yet, but stop taking penalties.
Jarry had an unbelievable stretch pass in the midst of a Flyers change leading to a Penguins 2-on-1. Flubbed.
Later, Pettersson would take his THIRD penalty. This led most to assume he was up late last night celebrating some holiday in Whoville.
Killed.
One of the Flyers stole Letang’s cocaine, leading to a scrum in front of the bench where 58 threw some punches. The Flyers would capitalize on the ensuing 4-on-4.
PHI Goal – Gostisbehere (3) A: Laughton, Voracek [12:04] 3-2 PHI
https://twitter.com/HeresYourReplay/status/1368282874231816193
God dammit.
Dumo had a great chance in the slot, but he barely grazed Elliott’s long shaft.
Just when it looked like Pens would have to climb out of another 3rd period hole, ZAR fired a harmless corner shot on net that somehow snuck through Elliott.
PIT Goal – ZAR (4) A: Tanev [18:10] 3-3
Bad angle shot from ZAR beats Elliott 3-3 #LetsGoPens https://t.co/KO6IE7swt4
— That's Hockey Talk (@ThatsHockeyTalk) March 6, 2021
The period would fizzle out shortly after Rust fanning on a wide open opportunity in front. Woulda brought the house down.
3RD PERIOD
Penguins brought their legs to start the third. Urgency was there, and it showed with the Flyers icing the puck like 18 times. Jarry made some saves.
Lafferty got dumped into the Flyers bench, which was appropriate considering he was playing for them.
Things were mud for the next 9 minutes until Guentzel was robbed by Elliott all alone on the doorstep.
BUT THEN!
With Korn allowing Brandon Tanev to leave band practice early, he hopped onto the ice to assist Malkin and McCann on a rush.
PIT Goal – McCann (5) A: Tanev, Malkin [10:41] 4-3 PIT
https://twitter.com/HeresYourReplay/status/1368296465907544065
McCann looking like Simone Biles with the somersault finish. Not sure what kind of Saturday you’re having if you didn’t shotgun a beer after that.
Nien Nunb missed a literal open net from right inside the blue line after the Flyers pulled the goalie. He was frazzled.
Penguins would hang on anyway as buttholes everywhere were clenched.
Massive win.
RANDOM THOUGHTS:
- Virtuoso effort from Malkin
- Check Natural Stat Trick yourself, but Jankowski and Lafferty played like 2 shifts all game. It’s an issue.
- Jarry with some big, timely saves. Again.
- McCann makes a legit difference in the lineup. Big change from last year.
- The Flyers said before the game they were treating the trip like a playoff series, having to win 2 of 3. Enjoy the long road back the Interstate, Rats.
LET’S BUST BALLS ON TWITTER: @GOOEYHOCKEY
LET’S BUST BALLS ON TWITTER: @GOOEYHOCKEY
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