Recapping Saturday’s Stud Performances

At the Preakness yesterday, Big Brown — a 1-5 freaking favorite — won in dominating fashion and increased the fees his family will be able to charge for pimping his horsey-seed out to other ladies of the stable. And now, for the next few weeks leading up to the Belmont Stakes on June 7, sports personalities will actually talk about horse racing as though it’s this awe-inspiring sport and the horses themselves as though they’re actual athletes. Whichever side you come down on in this debate, I must refer back to Jerry Seinfeld’s feelings on this, and that’s that it’s unlikely the winner is thinking “I won!” But more likely, he’s thinking, “Oat bag! I get my oat bag now! Oat bag time for meeeeeeee.

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In Detroit, Marty Turco stood tall and continued his quest to get to play defenseman as he actually assisted on Joel Lundqvist’s game-winning goal in the second period. The Stars held on to win 2-1 and send this series, which was once 3-0 Detroit, back to Dallas 3-2. That’s Turcolicious.

Now Detroit’s got to be a little nervous. They weren’t able to close out the Stars in Hockeytown so now the Stars go home to a rocking building with nothing to lose. Win and you’ve pushed an 0-3 deficit back to a Game 7. Turco will surely lose that one, but it would still be cool to see Detroit frightened.

Philly tries to do the same thing today in Pittsburgh — win on the Pens ice to force a Game 6 back in the city of brotherly love. Sidney Crosby, by the way, is not a stud in the facial hair department.

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Our final stud is Johan Santana, late of the Minnesota Twins, who beat the Yankees at the Stadium yesterday. Whatever, we Yankee fans didn’t want him anyway.

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