The Michigan Hangover: Put Down The Axe

Sometime in the 4th quarter, I was reprimanded by my family. I held a “Tailgate” party for the game for some friends and family out by my pole barn. Sometime in the 4th quarter, I grabbed an axe and bashed my foundation a few times. Childish? Yes. Necessary? Absolutely. My frustration meter was hitting peak levels. I’ve had time to simmer down a bit, and even though I couldn’t talk myself into watching the game again- I will try to give you a hangover post.

I realize that for many fans, this game was the “end all” for the 2009 season. If you are one of those fans, I really hope you read this post with an open mind. Put down splitting axe.

Not all was lost. Fighting Irish fans have a tendency to overreact after both, wins and losses. This is no different. I went and looked at a few message boards and saw post after post condemning Weis. I realize there are a lot of nutty nutbags out on the web- but seriously. get over it. This loss was not Charlie’s fault. This loss does not seal the deal on a mediocre season. We have 10 games left and most assuredly a bowl game, with 3 of those 10 regular season games being against teams that I would trade this game for a win in all 3. U$C, Michigan state, and Boston College. So just think about it for a minute, and put down the axe.

Jimmy Clausen can sling the motherfucking rock. Even with the loss to Michigan sitting there like a festering wound on our ass cheeks, we can look at Jimmy and be a lot more confident in him on the road. The offensive line protected Jimmy, and he turned out another big time performance with 336 yards, 3 TD’s, and most important- NO INT’S. Tate’s dropped balls, and a few route running mistakes on the wideouts were the only black marks on a passing game that is becoming damn near elite. Jimmy threw one very bad pass, and that was a dropped INT by a Michigan safety.

Not only was Jimmy passing the ball like the elite QB that he is, but he was really leading this team on the field and on the sideline. Jimmy did not make the “Tebow Speech” to the media afterwords, but he did gather the team after Weis spoke and said this would not happen again. He is becoming that all around QB that we hoped he would become.

The run defense is the cause for my diarrhea. It is sickening. I had my concerns after the Nevada game, but I allowed myself to think that maybe the defense was just keying on something else more dangerous. Now that I have seen 2 games in a row where the opposition averaged over 5 yards per carry- I’m a shaking bitch. Next up is a Michigan State team that always runs well, and remember Jake Locker, and- oh yeah… U$C.

I’m not going to sell out this defense just yet, considering they still pitched a shutout in the first game, but it is obvious that something is wrong. We all know that Tenuta is a blitz-happy psychopath that dreams of quarterbacks being gutted alive- but he is working with a limp. That limp is the defensive line.

I’m not seeing any real production from these guys. That leads to a 6 man rush instead of the “Tenuta 5.” That leads to defensive backs being out of position and wore down from man coverage. That leads to linebackers running past ball carriers. The defensive line has not done the job. Plain and simple. It is a line littered with talent- but young talent. This is not an excuse, as ND has a few upper-classmen in the main rotation, but it is just fact. And that sucks.

The nitty gritty is more grit than nit. With this post being published late on Monday, I will dispense with the bullshit that most of you already have read or heard. I do want to leave you with a few last thoughts about this game though. Just some things swirling in my head- and then I’m out like Kaiser Soze:

• Ask yourself this question, “When was the last time Notre Dame scored 34 points in Ann Arbor (whore)?” Give up? Try never- or at least not in the modern era (I didn’t look back into the early 1900’s).
• Michigan is a good team. They sucked balls last year, but they may make a legitimate run at the Big Ten conference, and they basically stole a victory from us in their house.
• We got “Bobby-Browned” After watching Michigan players cheap shot ND all day, ND got flagged for “shhhing” the crowd. Fuck Michigan.
• This offense NEEDS Michael Floyd. Remember last year after the Navy game? Yep. It sucked. that’s what it felt like when i saw Shaq Evans, a true freshman, run that route that should of been a first down and victory. If Floyd is out there- Irish win. Plain and simple. In a game where the other superstar WR struggled (Tate) Floyd made the big catches- until his patella was on national TV.
• Speaking of Tate. He has made enough amazing catches for you- the fat, slow fan, to shut the fuck up. Tough game. He’ll be fine.
• Armando Allen may be our only running back. It’s fucking sick and amazing to try and comprehend that fact- but it’s true.

That’s it. I’m done talking about this game. The rest of the season is still ahead. Try to enjoy some of it you whiny sacks of shit. Yes, there was AN AMAZING AMOUNT OF BULLSHIT that happened Saturday. We all need to move past it, just like this team does. No excuses- no surrender.

I’m sorry I called you a whiny sack of shit. I’m trying. I’m really trying… I need to put down the axe.