In Texas, The Tigers’ Bats Might Be Dead, But Elvis Is Not

elvis
Tigers’ bats were stifled, yet again, on Tuesday night in Arlington.  Their defense threw in three errors for good measure (five on the series).
What kept the Tigers’ Louisville toothpicks ever-so-quiet once again?  Welp, a ringer filling in for a dude with swine flu and a couple former (ugly) faces, amongst others, all held the Tigers to three second inning runs and struck out 10. And that’s all she wrote.
Meanwhile, Elvis is not dead (in Texas at least) as Elvis Andrus erupted for three hits and two rib-eye steaks while wearing his blue suede shoes. He is now 5-7 this series with 10 total bases and has raised his batting average from .251 to .263.  Tigers really know how to shut down a rookie nine hitter, huh? (Beckham was 5-15 with 2 HR for the White Sox last series).
Doug Mathis, filling in for swine-ridden Vincent Padilla, threw pretty well outside of a musty second inning when he allowed three runs.  He settled down to throw two shutout innings, but did not stay in long enough to get credit for the win.  Nope, adding insult to injury, Texas handed the ball to former Tiger Jason “Segal” Grilli who proceeded to punk Clete Thomas by throwing over his head and then turn away six in a row to put himself in line for the victory.     He may have gotten the best of the Tigers tonight, but he’s the one who has to live with this4lyfe:
grilli
After Grilli was lifted, the Tigers offensive anemia continued.  They could not muster anything up against “Everyday” Eddie Guardado, Darren O’Day, and former Tigers farm system sacrifice, Guillermo Moscoso.  Don’t feel bad Tigers’ hitters, that’s a group of real winners.
On the bright side, Miguel Cabrera really wanted to come out of his RISP funk, as he was 2-4 tonight, but the top three Tigers’ hitters had other plans: 0-12.
Detroit will attempt to salvage a game tomorrow night as Justin Verlander takes the hill against over-achieving Scott Feldman.
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