The Tigers are all broken and I’m feeling all emo about it. Let me help you feel something by making you relive the worst plays in somewhat recent Detroit sports history.
DETROIT TIGERS.
2006. Sean Casey forced out at first base on a line drive to Black Sox LF’er Pablo Ozuna. Sean Casey already possessed the quickness and agility of a below average senior citizen…but this was rough to watch.
DETROIT PISTONS.
1995. Pistons down by 3 with just seconds left against an aging Anfernee Hardaway and the Orlando Magic. Pistons inbound the ball to Lindsey Hunter. Lindsey…takes the ball straight to the hoop and lays it in as time expires. A very excited Hunter celebrates and tries to high-five a very confused Allan Houston.
DETROIT LIONS.
2008. We all remember this one well. The Dan Orlovsky safety vs. the Minnesota Sex Boats. You can relive this in all its glory here. The play is awful, but it climbs to worst play of all-time status by the simple fact that it took Orlovsky 8(!) steps to realize he ran out of the back of the endzone.
DETROIT RED WINGS.
Chris Osgood letting in goals from past center ice. This has happened multiple times and since then a simple dump in has been a scary thing with Ozzie in net. In Osgood’s defense, he did do this once.
…
Now that injury armageddon has squatted all over Tiger’s postseason chances, this has forced us to call up the Mud Hens. Most notably, Will Rhymes is now a Tiger. When Rhymes is not manning the 1’s and 2’s, Tiger fans can expect him to see time at 2B. Rhymes had respectable #’s in Toledo hitting .304. When asked about Rhymes promotion David Chadd who is the Vice President in Scouting described Rhymes skillz as being “sik wit it.”
Rhymes, Sizemore and Larish recently being promoted means that the Tigers roster will be full of n00bz. There is a real opportunity this lineup will soon be a reality.
P. Rick Porcello (n00b)
C. Alex Avila (n00b)
1B. Jeff Larish (n00b)
2b. Will Rhymes (n00b)
SS. Danny Worth (n00b)
3B. Scott Sizemore (n00b)
LF. Johnny Damon (OG)
CF. Austin Jackson (n00b)
RF. Brennan Boesch (n00b)
DH. Miguel Cabrera (OG)
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