Tuesdays With Moron

Welcome to another week of mindless ramblings, otherwise known as Tuesdays With Moron. Last week went pretty well, so, we thought we’d try this again. So let’s see what’s up.

So how ’bout that UW? Now that EWU has officially been slapped with probation, did you know that UW coaches have started trolling for some of their talent? It’s true, per Benedict Bob at the Times via the Spokesman-Review. Based on official rules, since EWU is on probation, their seniors have the ability to transfer without penalty. Some of the players mentioned include standout WR Aaron Boyce, a player who exploded with 85 catches and over 1300 yards as a sophomore under none other than Paul Wulff. Boyce had a less productive junior year last year, but still is highly regarded as a WR with good size (6-2, 205) and excellent hands.

There hasn’t been anything about WSU pursuing players from EWU in this manner, and we can probably expect that nothing will happen there. The relationship might be strained enough as it is, but if WSU were to try and poach some of their players, that would basically kill the relationship altogether, as well as completely tarnishing Wulff’s legacy in the process. Not that it isn’t a bit tarnished as it is, but one would think the last thing Wulff would do right now is try and rip some EWU players out of Cheney.

So is that cool for UW to do this? I mean sure, the NCAA will allow it. And Sarkisian and company are ultra-aggressive in everything they do, so it’s not a surprise that they would try to do something like this.

But I think they might want to tread lightly before they raid EWU, don’t you? After all, UW is going to have to establish relationships in the state, not necessarily with other colleges but certainly with the high schools, high schools they aren’t exactly familiar with right now. How would it look if they went out and yanked some of EWU’s top players? How would EWU coaches handle that? EWU coaches who are ALREADY established with in-state high school coaches? Gee, I don’t know, but you think they just MIGHT bad-mouth the UW coaches for doing such a thing? Nah….OK, I know, MORE UW ranting? That’s it, I promise….

How about that crazy Octuplets Mom? You know, the one who wants to actually BE Angelina Jolie?

The single mom on assisted living, who oh by the way, already has six kids of her own? You can imagine the fun by adding EIGHT newborns to the mix. Who in the hell thought this was a good idea? Even Apu and Manjula thought it was a bad idea, and they “only” had eight of their own.

I love the line in that episode “eight misbehavin'”, where Apu wakes up from sleep after feeding the newborns to say “Oh, I had the most wonderful dream last night….where I died.” Eight babies, they’re Nahasapeemapetilon-TASTIC!

Looks like Junior Griffey will be making his decision today. After all the done deal reports last week, it seemed just like waiting for the Pebble Beach golf deal to wind up, then he would hit Peoria for a physical and become a Mariner. But not so fast. Turns out Atlanta was where he wanted to go all along, a place his Dad enjoyed back in the day, and even openly campaigning Chipper Jones and Bobby Cox last week as the place he wants to be.

Personally, can you blame him? An hour flight away from his home base, close to kids and family, spring training 20 minutes from his home in Orlando, etc. Sure he’ll have to play the field, which at this point in his career is a really bad idea for health issues, but the Braves sure look better than the M’s at this point. Not that the Braves are going to go out and win a ring, not with the Phillies and Mets in their same division, but he clearly has a better shot to win in ATL. The only thing the M’s have going for them is the nostalgia factor, but as one writer said over the weekend, the only thing familiar for Griffey and Seattle anymore is the Mariner Moose. Everyone and everything else has changed since he last roamed centerfield in the 90’s. I don’t blame the guy, at his stage of his career to want to play close to home. I just wish he wouldn’t have said what he did back in 2007, when the three-day love fest during his triumphant return climaxed with him saying he wanted to retire a Mariner. M’s fans (like me) haven’t been able to let that go. And closure from the whole messy divorce would have been a good thing. But what can you do? It’s called free agency for a reason, and he’s free to go play wherever he wants. And it looks like Atlanta is going to win his services.

So, the Evil Empire is looking for a bailout. Have you heard the spiraling, out of control costs of the next Death Star?? $15.6 Septillion!!?

The number is so big I don’t even know how to spell it. But it looks like this:

$15,602,022,489,829,821,422,840,226.94. WOW.

As Gizmodo points out, if you had that kind of money, instead of saving the world from the economic crisis, you could simply build the Death Star, blow up Earth and move on to invade the rest of the galaxy.

Anyway, the current Death Star situation has Darth Vader himself completely out of his mind. He’s been rambling incoherently about things that are way out of context, confusing everyone around him. Even the stress is wearing down the most evil sith lord of all-time. See for yourself (some NSFW-ish language):

That’s all I’ve got for today. Enjoy your Tuesday, and GO COUGS!