Zitosis

Zitosis: a condition that free agents are most susceptible to after signing huge, abominable contracts. The most common symptom is a drastic decline of the player’s performance in the first 1 to 3 or 4 years after signing the contract. Other symptoms may include apathy for the new team’s performance; moodiness; callous attitude for the player’s own poor performance; and disruptive behavior in the dugout, clubhouse and in public.

This condition first appeared in December of 2006 when free agent Barry Zito signed a contract with the San Francisco Giants for 7 years and $126 million. In his 1st 3 years with the Giants, he lost more games than he won, his ERA ranged from 4.03 to 5.15, and WHIP’s of 1.60 as his highest and 1.35 as his best. So far this year, he has won 8 games and lost 6 with a 3.49 ERA and a 1.24 WHIP. He is finally starting to look like has overcome his affliction.

It seems that John Lackey may have contracted this affliction when he signed with the Red Sox, but it appears that his diagnosis may be milder than the pitcher after whom it has been named. His condition will continue to be monitored.

Daisuke Matsuzaka seems to have a delayed presentation of Zitosis. After signing with the Red Sox in 2007, he had a relatively successful year in his 1st year playing in the United States. He had a very good year in 2008 despite his relatively high 1.32 WHIP, winning 18 and losing only 3 games. 2009 saw his ERA climb up to 5.76 and a horrendous 1.87 WHIP while spending much of the season on the DL. In this season, he has won more games than lost, and his ERA and WHIP numbers have improved over the previous season, but he still has not lived up to the potential that was expected of him when he signed in 2007.

There is hope though, for free agents suffering from Zitosis. If you know a free agent who may be suffering from Zitosis, tell them to ask their doctors about Fukitol, a new drug showing remarkable improvements in performance. Big pharmaceutical companies urge you to talk to talk to your doctor soon about Fukitol.

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Zitosis

Alan Draper

Alan Draper

Alan Draper