Bret Bielema is calling on the Hogs, without calling the Hogs (because that takes FOREVER), to involve more exclaims of “Wooo Pig” in their day-to-day lives. In fact, he wants “Wooo Pig” used so much that it becomes the “Roll Tide” of Arkansas fans’ vocabulary.
Listen as Bert explains his dream for Wooo Pig usage:
[soundcloud url=”https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/203284822″ params=”color=ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false” width=”100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]A QUEST FOR THE AGES.
If you didn’t listen to that because, UGH, 34 seconds, Bert mentioned several occasions when a Wooo Pig is appropriate. Obviously, Bert doesn’t have time to sit and talk to a radio show about all the times Wooo Pig can be used (there are more tight ends to be found!), but this is the list so far:
Times When You Should Say Wooo Pig
When you see a nice piece of pizza
Somebody walking by has a nice look
Somebody walking by has a nice suit on
Nothing delights me more than the thought of Arkansas restaurants being filled with Wooo Pigs when food arrives at the table.
Now, Bert didn’t offer any other specific examples, but one can assume he’s just providing the guidelines for when to say Wooo Pig. He’s leaving it up to Arkansas fans to interpret when a Wooo Pig is most appropriate.
But if Bert wants Wooo Pig to achieve Roll Tide status, he’s got to remind the people of more times they should say it, even the seemingly out-of-place times. Following THE TIDE’S EXAMPLE, JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE DO, here’s an expanded list of when to say Wooo Pig.
Additional Times When You Should Say Wooo Pig
When you are arrested in a drug raid and proclaim your innocence
When you show up at work high on heroin and pass out on your desk, then are arrested
When you poison trees that aren’t yours
When you are arrested for destroying a nice house on spring break
When your daughter and her boyfriend drop domestic charges against each other
When the most wanted man in the world is killed
When you take to snowy/icy roads to slide around
When folks get married
Woo Pig* indeed.
*While penning this masterpiece, I kept typing “Wood Pig” whenever I tried to type “Wooo Pig”. This led to me thinking about Bert one day building a giant wooden pig that Arkansas would use as some type of Trojan Horse.
Why would they need a giant wooden pig that could be used to destroy a city? That I do not know, but I do know it might be nice to have one just in case.
“Wooo Pig, that’s a nice Wood Pig.”
UPDATE: Changed “Woo Pig” to “Wooo Pig” because that’s how Bert spells it.
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