Deadball

I have to be honest here … when I see reliever Scott Atchison pitch I think: "Is this one of those guys that was signed because all the draft eligible players were called to fight in World War I?" And don't even start with the outrage, because you thought it too. Look at him. He's 37 yet he doesn't look a day over 59.

The other thing I think when I see Scott Atchison pitch was "I guess the Sox are losing by 30". And while that might have been true in 2011, believe it or not it wasn't true in 2012, as Atchison pitched a lot of 7th and 8th innings … in victories, no less. Victories! A quick check of his stats told me that Atchison, the newest New York Met, can pitch. Guy had a 1.58 ERA last season with a WHIP under 1. How the hell did I not notice what a decent season he had?

Oh that's right. Because when the Red Sox went straight to hell the world stopped watching. Even Red Sox fans themselves were renting Sex and The City 2 on Netflix in record numbers, that's how putrid they were. Begs the question: If a guy has a 1.58 ERA and nobody is there to see it …

So how did the Mets get Atchison to come to their team? Well, he gets hurt all the time. Had forearm tightness that turned into a ligament strain last season, and in 2011 had … well since I can't find it on the internet, let's just call it dysentery. Yeah, dysentery in 2011. Makes sense. So that's how the Mets were able to sign him, along with all the really good relievers that went to the Red Sox this offseason … causing Atchison to trickle down to the Mets, albeit affordably. Which is good because it enabled the Mets to take a little trip to Houston to buy Michael Bourn dinner. And because they didn't spend a lot on Atchison, they were able to take Bourn to a pants-wearing restaurant instead of the food court at the Memorial City Mall.

But to the original point: Scott Atchison looks old. But anybody with a WHIP of 0.99 in the A.L. East can't be all bad, unless of course he has a two day injury that turns into the rest of the season. It certainly lowers the odds of "if everything goes right" actually going right. So let's enjoy him while he lasts. And get ready to truly return to the deadball era when he gets hurt.