While I will brag to anybody who will listen that it was me all along who said for months that the Mets should go get Yoenis Cespedes, there are many more thing that I am wrong about. For instance, the day the Mets signed Bartolo Colon while I was Christmas shopping in Roosevelt Field:
I hate this team.
— Metstradamus (@Metstradamus) December 11, 2013
I like to remind myself of this when my head gets big and I start bemoaning the fact that I haven’t become a big time writer for MLB.com or something. When I start going on and on about how smart I am and how I should be places in life. When Bartolo, at age 42, throws eight innings of shutout ball I remind myself about how far I’ve come with Colon. From absolutely throwing my hands up in the sky because the Mets thought a 40-year-old could replicate Matt Harvey’s production, to wondering why the Mets haven’t had a bobblehead made for him. (My wife says to me tonight: “If Bartolo had a gnome, I’d wait on line for five hours before a game for one.”)
Of course, the Braves should probably be ashamed of themselves for letting themselves get shut out by a 42-year-old man for eight innings, but let’s face it: They’re probably going to be shutout by men and women of all ages this season. While Colon struggled to start, first inning home runs by David Wright, Yoenis Cespedes, and Lucas Duda gave Bartolo the cushion he needed to cruise to a 4-1 victory. Colon is a champion for all of us who have “alternate body types”. But I have a bad feeling that the more success Bartolo has, the more that people who aren’t physically fit as Colon is will go out and think they can swing a bat or dive for a football or wrestle a bear. The more Bartolo beats guys like Mallex Smith to first base, the more idiots will end up in the hospital thinking they can emulate him. This is dangerous.
Who wouldn’t want to emulate him? I mean, the guy hits a hard foul ball and gets the Statcast treatment:
[mlbvideo id=”650127983″ width=”400″ height=”224″ /]I do believe he’s going to run into one and hit one out this season. I’ll probably be wrong about that too, but I’ll go on record and say that it’s coming.
Oh, and one more thing I was wrong about: While I knew Asdrubal Cabrera was a defensive upgrade, I wasn’t sure the amount of upgrade was worth all the money he was paid. All I heard was how much this guy lost in the field, and how he would have to find another position.
[mlbvideo id=”649909083″ width=”400″ height=”224″ /]Wrong. Again. Worth every single penny.
Please remind me of this next time I go on about how I should be the next Gammons.
Today’s Hate List
- Adonis Garcia
- Erick Aybar
- Adam Wainwright
- Josh Ravin
- Cuba (C’mon, let the defectors play!)
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