Big Dummy Misses Big Sexy

I was really excited about coming home and watching the Reds/Mets game on my DVR, and bringing you my irrepressible wit and wisdom on it. Mostly because I know at this time of the year you’re all watching football, and I might be your only source of anything on this game.

Unfortunately, my DVR has a sense of humor, and set itself to DVR tomorrow’s replay of the Mets and the Reds on SNY. I have no idea how this happened.

So you’re just going to have to take my word for it that the Mets won 8-4. Mark Vientos had three hits, two of them off the lefty starter Brandon Williamson. The third one was off a righty, and he almost took his head off.

Third knock of the day for @MarkVientos_5! 👏 pic.twitter.com/BP5kstFDvC

— New York Mets (@Mets) September 17, 2023

Also, it was Bartolo Colon Day.

Citi Field is decked out for Bartolo Colón on the day he officially retired as a New York Met pic.twitter.com/Gk290IwM6J

— SNY Mets (@SNY_Mets) September 17, 2023

Wait, that cologne is real? I can’t tell anymore.

Bartolo Colón says that Noah Syndergaard was the one who gave him the Big Sexy nickname 😂 pic.twitter.com/4WQxY2IIQI

— SNY (@SNYtv) September 17, 2023

I’m going to refrin from the jokes about “can he pitch now because we need him?” But I will say that seeing Bartolo in uniform hammers home the point that 40 doesn’t look right on the wispy Drew Smith. And by the way, any coincidence that Smith has fallen off this season after losing 15 or so pounds? Guy needs to get on the Bartolo “Calories for Athleticism” diet plan.

9/5/2015 Bartolo Colón makes an incredible behind-the-back flip to retire Justin Bour at first base. Colón also becomes the oldest Met to throw a shutout and extends his scoreless streak to 25 innings. pic.twitter.com/FOcGwRTDX3

— This Day in Mets History (@NYMhistory) September 5, 2023

Or maybe Drew can just acquire Bartolo’s fastball command.

I’m sorry, this is what happens when I blog about a game I didn’t watch: I rag on Drew Smith for no good reason, especially when he /checks box score … got a big out in the 7th with runners on first and third in relief of Jose Quintana, who pitched in his 300th career game and won. I can be unfair sometimes. It’s only because I missed the win and I’m in a foul mood.

By the way, it’s amazing to think about the staying power of Bartolo: That play you see above is tweeted (or X’d) out every year on its anniversary … without fail. September 5th every year … Bartolo goes behind the back. I guess that’s why he got his very own day today.  The plaque in the Mets Hall of Fame isn’t too far behind … all he has to do is teach Smith that command and maybe announce for them for 20 years.

September 5th: “Bartolo Athleticism Day.”

Both Bartolo Colón and Terry Collins share their favorite memories from Bartolo Colón's Mets career: pic.twitter.com/RaTIV8WWYw

— SNY (@SNYtv) September 17, 2023

In all seriousness, the story Terry told at the end about Bartolo wearing one to save the bullpen is impressive, and I only hope that through all the flair and the home run and the cartoonish stuff, we take some time to remember that. That’s being a good teammate, and that’s all that any player in MLB would ever ask. Be a good teammate. Bartolo was that.

Bartolo Colón throws out the first pitch to Brandon Nimmo ahead of today's game pic.twitter.com/Fgxsdw9qfY

— SNY (@SNYtv) September 17, 2023

And he still throws strikes. Take note, Drew.

Today’s Hate List

1. My Spectrum DVR
2. Now I gotta watch the Cubs and Diamondbacks and be all depressed.
3. Depressed because watching teams in the playoff chase are playing.
4. And I’m sure Karl Ravech will say something that will depress me.
5. Like David Cone did when he compared Corbin Carroll to Derek Jeter.