Can Peter Chiarelli Make the Oilers Great Again?

The Edmonton Oilers have a tremendous problem. The team is currently the National Hockey League’s twenty-ninth place team and will miss the playoffs for the tenth straight season. General Manager Peter Chiarelli—a Stanley Cup winner in Boston, not a lightweight—has lots of work to do this summer. Can he make the Oilers great again? That’s the $10 billion question.

One real estate mogul and presidential hopeful once said, “You have to think anyway, so why not think big?” Hopefully Chiarelli is thinking big thoughts and getting ready to make some big moves. Here are some big moves Chiarelli could make to get the Oilers on the road to being great again.

1. Tell Craig MacTavish and Scott Howson, “You’re fired!”

Craig MacTavish had his chance to fix the defense in the summer of 2014 and came away with Nikita Nikitin and Mark Fayne. NIKITA NIKITIN AND MARK FAYNE! Bold…but stupid. And you don’t need a magnifying glass to see Scott Howson’s fingerprints all over the signing of Nikitin. To make matters worse, MacTavish undervalued Jeff Petry and didn’t seem to put up much of an effort to keep him in Edmonton. “Craig’s on it”? Maybe not on the payroll for too much longer.

2. Add two right-shot defensemen.

Even a moron knows that the Oilers need to improve their defense. And since building a wall along the blue line is currently illegal in the NHL, Chiarelli will need to acquire at least a couple of defensemen. Furthermore, there’s evidence that supports the idea that the handedness of defenseman is important (i.e., left-right pairings perform better than left-left or right-right pairings). And the Oilers currently have a need for defensemen who are both right-handed and good. Who are the best targets? Darcy “Woodguy” McLeod suggests trading for Travis Hamonic and signing UFA Jason Demers. That sounds good to me. One thing is certain: Chiarelli should not feel comfortable going forward with the D corpse corps as presently constituted. But I would be reasonably comfortable going into 2016-17 with the defense looking something like this:

Klefbom (L)-Hamonic (R)
Sekera (L)-Demers (R)
Nurse (L)-Davidson (L)

3. See if Steven Stamkos will sign a value contract to play with Connor McDavid.

This one’s a longshot, but think big! I’m not sure what would be sweeter, adding Stamkos to the Oilers’ lineup or hearing the weeping and wailing from Toronto. The McDavid-Stamkos-Auston Matthews trifecta would cause an Ontario meltdown of biblical proportions.

4. Don’t trade any of the three centers.

There’s no rule that says the Oilers have to trade one of Ryan Nugent-Hopkins or Leon Draisaitl this summer. Remember when everyone was complaining last year about the Oilers’ woeful center depth? DON’T TRADE IT AWAY! Having three all-star centers is not a problem. Todd McLellan will find a way to give all three sufficient ice time.

5. Don’t trade Taylor hall and tell fans to get off his back.

Hall is an elite left winger. They don’t grow on trees, folks. Yes, he gives the puck away quite a bit, but take a look at the league leaders in giveaways. Who wouldn’t want any of the players on the top of that list? By the way, Hall leads the Oilers in takeaways. No one talks about this, and that needs to change. If one of the $6 millon men needs to be traded, trade Jordan Eberle. (But only trade him to get someone like Hamonic.)

6. If the goal is to get “heavier,” add heavy players with skill.

This appears to be what Chiarelli is trying to do. Patrick Maroon and Zack Kassian are not Mike Brown and Darcy Hordichuk. They’ve got some skill to go with their largeness. Some Oiler fans seem to think it would be the worst thing in the world if Chiarelli signed Milan Lucic—a big guy who can score. I can think of worse things…like re-signing Nikitin.

7. Get creative in trying to move unwanted contracts.

First on the list of unwanted contracts is Lauri Korpikoski (one more year at $2.5 million)–the new and improved Lennart Petrell. Then there’s Andrew Ference (one more year at $3.24 million). I’ll be honest, I don’t know all the ins and outs of the CBA, but Chiarelli needs to do everything he can to get that contract off the books. Chiarelli probably also would like to move Mark Fayne (two more years at $3.625 million)–not a bad defenseman, but the Oilers should aim higher. My suggestion for getting rid of these contracts: call Vancouver GM Jim Benning everyday.

The aforementioned real estate mogul and presidential hopeful also said, “People love me. And you know what, I have been successful. Everybody loves me.” Oiler fans will also love Peter Chiarelli if he’s successful at making the Oilers great again. Godspeed, Peter.