I’m Seriously Not Making This Up

Read the following while I laugh myself into a stupor:

The Marlins’ search for relievers has led them to Armando Benitez. They plan to sign the long-time closer and assign him to Triple A, according to Clark Spencer of the Miami Herald. Spencer notes that Benitez will likely be in uniform for the New Orleans Zephyrs tonight, assuming he passes his physical.

I have to tell you that I laughed so hard reading this that I pulled Angel Pagan’s other side muscle.  So Pagan is out for three months.  Sorry about that.

But Benitez?  Somewhere in the Marlins’ offices Bobby Valentine is saying “uh, y’know what … never mind.”