Ouchie

So Daniel Murphy is out for at least a week and could miss Opening Day, Noah Syndergaard is headed for Las Vegas, and …

Got even stronger indication from 2nd source — while it’s not official, #Mets intentionally lining up Bartolo Colon for Opening Day in DC.

— Adam Rubin (@AdamRubinESPN) March 21, 2015

//platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsGlorious times.

Sandy Alderson explained that Dilson Herrera will stay in minor league came so that he wouldn’t be eligible for the perks of the major league disabled list (otherwise known as Frank Francisco’s Club Med) if he gets hurt. Alderson also reiterated that Wilmer Flores would not be sliding over to second base to replace Murphy, because he is the shortstop. And in case you didn’t get the message, here’s a quote:

“Wilmer is the shortstop. Wilmer is the shortstop. It’s taken us this long to convince you guys that Wilmer is the shortstop.” –Sandy Alderson

How long? Longer than it took to convince us that Zack Wheeler’s injury was a mere case of tendinitis. But back to Syndergaard, and the circumstances surrounding his option to minor league camp of which Alderson had this to say:

“So apparently took a ball off his ankle yesterday playing catch and it was a little ouchie this morning so we sent him over for an X-Ray. He is more or less fine. He was scheduled to pitch tomorrow, but we are just going to bang him for tomorrow and because he’s not pitching tomorrow, we optioned him today.” –Sandy Alderson

A little “ouchie”? Why does Sandy Alderson sound less like the general manager of a baseball team and more like a surburban soccer mom from Passaic? Or was “Ouchie” a Pink Lady in Grease? And a ball off the ankle playing catch? Who the hell is Syndergaard playing catch with … Peter Dinklage? If that’s the case … can Dinklage throw lefthanded?