Wasted Week. STEELERS LOSE.

Not much you can say about this game. Jeff Reed missed some field goals. Mendenhall ran on the Ravens. Batch looked like his savvy, veteran self. From the outset, this week didn’t feel much like Ravens week. I think everyone knew the Steelers’ offense wouldn’t be able to really put up points without Ben (Tampa sucks, whatever about that game) and the defense wasn’t going to be that dominant four straight weeks. It is what it is. We saw the Steelers get out of their unwinnable four-game schedule with a 3-1 record. It sucks that that “1” is Baltimore, but really, we’re four games into the season. We don’t know if that will matter yet.

Ben Roethlisberger will join his team this week and they’ll all have two full weeks to prepare for Cleveland. If you’re a QB, it’s hard to ask for a better situation to come back to. But, if you don’t feel like looking forward just yet, we’ll take a look back at this game before we put it to bed.

FIRST QUARTER

Ravens won the coin toss and put their defense out first. A challenge, is it? Ray Lewis is all fired up for the first play of the game because he tackles Mendenhall for a two yard gain. Batch has a thousand years in the pocket on 3rd & 5 and still gets sacked.

Surprise, Derrick Mason decides to finally show up this season for the Steeler game. Naturally. How has he not retired yet? Then he catches like 15 more catches because we hate him. Finally, Polamalu and Woodley swallow McGahee in the backfield, and the Ravens miss a 46-yard field goal.

Hines Ward draws a pass interference call. Antwaan Randle El is ten levels of champ on a post route and Batch hits him in the hands in stride and he takes it down to the goal line. Rashard Mendenhall shoves the football right down Ray Lewis’ throat for the touchdown. Remember that sweet tackle you made for two yards on the first play, Ray? Where’s that fire? I thought letting Mendenhall get only two yards was worth jumping up and celebrating? It’s 7-0.

Does Derrick Mason ever not catch huge passes against the Steelers? 40 yards on first down. Barf. Todd Heap drops a pass but Flacco just starts firing to everyone all the time all the way down the field.

SECOND QUARTER

The Unflappable One throws a screen pass but Boldin took off on a post route for it. Hurr. McGahee takes a free run into the end zone.  7-7.

Ray makes another tackle around the line of scrimmage and acts like it took any talent. Wow, you hit a running back one on one when he’s surrounded on all sides already? What a play.

Mike Wallace picks up a first down. Mendenhall runs right past Lewis who tackles him too late for a first down. What’s the matter, Ray? You made another non-play and you’re not dancing! Batch overthrows a wide-open Heath Miller. No clue how he keeps doing that. He gets hit as he throws and the pass gets batted away. Punt.

A ref throws a totally unnecessary flag because apparently defensive backs have to always be looking at the ball at all times and if the QB underthrows a pass it’s a penalty on the defense. They take it personally and play the next three downs in Joe Flacco’s mouth. The Ravens punt.

Pouncey takes [probably] his first penalty of his career on a pretty obvious hold. Mendenhall runs full speed into Haloti Ngata. Like watching an RC car hit a brick wall. Batch fumbles at the 2, Pouncey jumps on it, a pair of penalties offset and that down never happens, so on the next play, Batch scrambles, eludes a few defenders, and falls down when he runs into Flozell Adams.

It’s getting pretty frustrating to watch an outside rusher get barely clipped on every play and fall before he can get within arm’s reach of Flacco. Derrick Mason is somewhere in Ontario, gets legally jammed by James Harrison within the league-mandated 5-yards of the line of scrimmage, and dives to the turf while Flacco throws a pass out of bounds back where the actual game is happening. He buys the penalty. What a sickening call. Mason shouldn’t still have a functioning hip.

Someone finally calls a player for tearing James Harrison’s jersey off his back. It’s Michael Oher. Somewhere a white woman who just saw “The Blind Side” feels bad. Billy Cundiff barely squeezes in a 33 yard field goal as time runs out in the half.

THIRD QUARTER

You can always count on Baltimore to take penalties on kick returns. They start the second half from their own 11. Timmons almost forces a three and out but he takes a bad angle on Todd Heap and the Ravens keep driving.

A 3rd & 7 quickly develops for the Steelers and Batch goes down. Reed winds up for a 49 yard field goal and hits the post. Considering that started with a turnover, I’m just counting that as prolonged defense.

Polamalu knows the snap count and chases Flacco outside. He throws it away before Timmons eats his ribcage for lunch. Le’Ron McClain throws a hissy fit for some reason.

Heath gets called for holding but Heath doesn’t make mistakes so that was clearly a bad call. Batch somehow overthrows Mike Wallace. Missing Heath? Overthrowing Wallace? Laws just don’t apply to Charlie Batch I guess. Either way, the Steelers punt.

McClain gets a head of steam and runs into a Ryan Clark torpedo. Both are hurt on the play. Steeler-Raven football right there.

Spatula-hands Ike actually MAKES AN INTERCEPTION. HE ACTUALLY CATCHES A FOOTBALL THROWN BY AN OPPOSING QUARTERBACK. OH MY GOD. He can’t even believe it.

The offense doesn’t get it done and Jeff Reed goes out to earn the pitiful, meager $2.8 million salary the Steelers have punished him with this season. But, oh wait, he misses the field goal. Again.

Can’t wait to draft a new kicker next April.

FOURTH QUARTER

The Ravens offense doesn’t do much as James Farrior makes his first pass-defense in two years.

Batch finally finds Heath Miller wide open in front of Ray Lewis. Charlie shows why he’s the real deal and keeps drawing the Ravens offside one after another. And when they jump, he takes chances on his free plays. No one feels worse than be for predicting he’d get cut this summer.

The Ravens waste a timeout getting their defense ready to give up a first down to Heath Miller. Mike Wallace drops a ball in the end zone. Another pass is deflected but Randle El hauls in a laser-guided missile of a pass for a first down. Mendenhall keeps quietly grinding out yardage a little bit at a time. Then he decides he’s had enough of abusing Ray Lewis up the middle and takes one outside for seven yards into the end zone. 14-10. Reed actually made the extra point.

Of course, he gets the kickoff to almost the 20 yard line. No one covers Houshmandzadeh because they all forgot he was still in the NFL and he makes a 21-yard catch. Boldin gets another first. Woodley gets Rice in the backfield. Keisel has some trainers working on his leg out on the field.

That woman who saw “The Blind Side” told a ref how bad she felt for Oher, so they let him false start now and then. The Ravens set up on 1st & goal. Flacco overthrows Boldin but is still not flapped. Rice cuts up the middle to the 2. Woodley nails Flacco and Gay knocks the pass down. Todd Heap is allowed to flinch and then play it off as a timeout. Wasn’t aware tight ends could just do that.

Pittsburgh calls a timeout, perhaps to ice Joe Flacco. Shanahanigans. William Gay makes another deflection on fourth down. Willie, take note, this is the appropriate time to get up and celebrate a routine defensive play. Nice goal line stand for #22.

Kemoeatu false starts. Eff that. Mendenhalls runs a few yards to the two-minute warning. 3rd & 7 with two minutes left. Baltimore has no timeouts. The Steelers are staring out of their own end zone. Matt Spaeth false starts now. Guess he thought he played the same position as Todd Heap and followed the same rules. Mendy can’t do anything with a 3rd & 10 from his goal line. Punt.

Some weird holding penalties are enforced and the Ravens get an extra ten yards. Boldin makes two catches for one first down. TJ catches another in a desperate attempt to stay relevant. And he does indeed get his name in the paper when he gets wide open in the end zone. 17-14. That looked way too much like 2009 in general.

Ray Lewis gets to feel like he really is playing like a 25-year-old when Batch hits him with the game-ending interception. Can’t hate on Batch. He was doing what he could and played a solid game against a great defense.

• Whatever.
• Baltimore: 70 yards rushing combined. Defense is getting it done up front.
• You wouldn’t be wrong to blame Jeff Reed for this loss. He makes either of those field goals and we either win or go to OT.
• Seriously, how good will this team be when their superstar quarterback makes his return?
• Bye week coming up. Get ready to relax and just watch some straight up football on Sunday.