By Sean Kennedy (@PhillyFastBreak)
(Update: Per Deadspin, Sam Hinkie will not be teaching at Stanford, but be acting as a guest speaker. It’s still fun to speculate, though, and he is, in fact, alive.)
He lives! Contrary to popular belief, former Sixers GM Sam Hinkie did not die for our sins. Wednesday afternoon, he reached out to the public with his first 10 tweets ever on his long-dormant twitter account.
Sam’s family is now living in Palo Alto, CA, he apparently loves snowboarding, and perhaps most interestingly, Hinkie will be teaching at Stanford University.
8 | While I wait to see what’s next for us, I’ll teach a little (at Stanford), keep talking to the long list of people I can learn from,…
— Sam Hinkie (@samhinkie) September 14, 2016
Courtesy of the fine people at Stanford, we received an exclusive faux-look at the list of courses Professor Hinkie will be teaching over the next couple semesters.
Strategic Leadership
This course examines fundamental issues of general management and leadership within an organization. You will learn about setting an organization’s strategic direction, aligning structure to implement strategy, and leading individuals within the firm. Much of the material will focus on a strict adherence to a drafting the best player available philosophy. Not covered: what to do when you’re stuck with two-thirds of your roster being big men who can’t play together.
Ethics in Management
This course emphasizes frameworks for conducting ethical analysis (on what basis can you say that a course of action is or is not ethical), the analysis of ethical dilemmas (how do you think about situations in which different ethical precepts collide), and how to deal on a day-to-day basis with the practical issues of ethical behavior in organizations. In particular, we’ll cover how to proceed and still do what’s best for your organization when ownership has planted a nefarious, bloodthirsty snake in your midst as a special advisor. Think of this course as Defense Against the Dark Arts for the modern workplace.
Optimization and Simulation Modeling
Disciplined thought is often based on analytical models: simplified, quantitative depictions of a complex reality that allow you to focus your attention on a few key issues. Management runs on numbers and models. We’ll break down lottery odds, expected gains from pick swaps, and the overwhelming importance of planting plenty of seeds in order to build your orchard. Not covered: how to speed up timelines so that disgruntled owners don’t force a league commissioner to implement a coup.
Human Resource Management
The human resources of an organization are often the most valuable assets of the organization, and the assets that are most difficult to manage. Whether it’s having to release yet another player on a 10-day contract, shuttle Lorenzo Brown back and forth to Delaware every week, or persuade second-round picks to sign long-term, team-friendly deals, interacts with people is a key to success. Not covered: dealing with uninformed media types stuck in the stone age.
Sounds enlightening! Make sure to get your name on those waiting lists. Until then, see you on the slopes.
9 | …watch tons of basketball, and soak up all that I can. Oh, and snowboard. For sure snowboard.
— Sam Hinkie (@samhinkie) September 14, 2016
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