Dear Adam,
I adore you and it’s beyond the scope of my vocabulary to express how ELATED I was to see that you pitched well tonight.
What a terrific job you did throwing baseballs!
It’s really quite something how you tossed a complete game shutout. That doesn’t happen SUPER often, and it’s even more kickass in light of your early season struggles and nagging injuries.
Way to stick it to the MAN! (Or other baseball players, as the case may be. I am very stupid and possibly brain damaged from too much WGN.)
In any case, I think you are special and will probably pass you a note in math class to ask if you will marry me. Please say yes.
Love,
Trumbsy
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