The Sports Daily > Days of Y'Orr
Milan Lucic still ‘impacting’ the Buffalo Sabres

Hey, hey, hey!

Remember that time when Milan Lucic ran through Ryan Miller and everyone shat themselves ’cause apparently hitting in hockey is a foreign concept? And then Miller called Lucic a “piece of shit” and Buffalo pretended Miller had a concussion and then when Looch threatened Shanahan to reveal the blackmail photos he has on Shanny doing naughty things with Bettman’s dog and got out of a suspension Buffalo announced that Miller only had whiplash?

And then Buffalo tried fighting Lucic LUlz.

And then a few weeks ago we found out that a Bobby Ryan/Jonas Hiller for Miller deal was all but done until Lucic ran that deal into the ice, as it were?

Well now Buffalo is dismantling it’s entire team just so it can man up with Looch… or pretend to.

Since Free Agency Day, the Sabres front office has been trying to “toughen up” it’s ranks. They signed John Scott to apparently chirp Shawn Thornton via the media… and be terrible at hockey. Twos still has no fucking clue who John Scott is, probably because Scott is the most irrelevant “enforcer” in the NHL. He also sucks at hockey (it’s worth repeating).

And then yesterday Buffalo signed Brave Steve Ott to take cheap shots and turtle when asked to answer for his shenanigans. Apparently the Sabres feel like hometown d-bag and turtle Patrick Kaleta needed to have pressure put on him to up his d-bag game to keep his roster spot.

In return for Brave Steve Ott (and Adam Pardy) the Sabres got rid of Derek Roy who did his best to high tail it out of Buffalo. We can’t blame him. Now it’s like Buffalo is trying to sign every guy that Boston hates. It’s almost awe-inspiring if it wasn’t laughable. 

Can’t wait for that Kaleta-Ott-Scott line to be a combined -100 for the year. Kaleta can headbutt guys while Ott does his “knee seeking missle” routine. Meanwhile Scott will try to skate without milk crates holding him up.

It’s good that Buffalo is trying to toughen up but doing it because of one team, nay, one player is a perfect way of not making it into the post-season. They’re also doing an awful job of it. Not sure if Darcey Regier realizes they don’t play Boston 82 times a year. We almost feel bad for our Sabre fan friends. And as much as we wish that Chiarelli was improving the Bruins at least he’s not making them worse. So there’s that.

Thanks for the LOLz, Buffalo. See you in October. 

S/T to Ty Anderson for the incidental collision pun.