Bret Boone is Dating Tiger Woods’ Ex

I haven’t cared this little about a baseball player’s personal life since I found out Alex Rodriguez was dating former WWE Diva Torrie Wilson.

Okay, I’m lying…I’m totally into this junk.

I hope you’re sitting down, internet.  Former Major Leaguer (and third-generation star) Bret Boone is, reportedly, dating Tiger Woods’ ex-sidepiece Rachel Uchitel.  Gasp!  Oh, I know what you’re thinking…aren’t both parties married?  Nope.  Uchitel is officially divorced from her second husband and Boone…he and his wife are officially separated.  Oh.  Em.  Gee.

Now, with all apologies to Kanye West, I’m not saying she’s a gold digger…but the former All-Star made nearly $50 million during his 14-year big league career and she is appearing on a reality show called “Millionaire Matchmaker”.  That’s how the song went, right?  Maybe not.

Either way…at least we have this Brandt Beef Jerky commercial to pass the time!