The Pensblog’s second annual ‘Who played f—ed up?’ list: Post 2019 Stanley Cup Playoffs edition

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Well, that was quick, wasn’t it?

In case you missed it last year, I started a new tradition over here at the blog where we attempt to write words about the Pittsburgh Penguins – one in which I recap all of the injuries the Penguins were playing through throughout the course of the postseason. A topic that no other media outlet is definitely not writing about (or already wrote about since since I’m about ten hours late to the party)!

Since it was a short one this year, I’m going to keep this blog short and sweet.

So who played fucked up in the four games the Penguins played after the 2018-2019 regular season ended?

  • Brian Dumoulin – Torn PCL

According to Wikipedia, the Posterier Cruciate Ligament (or PCL as we folks in the medical community like to refer to it as) is “one of the four major ligaments of the knee. It connects the posterior intercondylar area of the tibia to the medial condyle of the femur. This configuration allows the PCL to resist forces pushing the tibia posteriorly relative to the femur.”

(full disclosure: I don’t work in the medical community.)

So what the fuck does any of that mean?

The PCL is basically the ligament inside of your knee that lies behind your ACL, yet also helps connect your thigh bone (femur) to your shin bone (tibia) just like your ACL does:

ligaments-of-the-knee.0.jpg

The good news – according to the dorks over at Harvard, unlike ACL tears, most athletes can get away with treating PCL injuries without surgical intervention, depending on the severity of the tear. In fact, Connor McDavid recently sustained a PCL injury himself during Edmonton’s final game of yet another dumpster fire of a regular season, yet he will not require surgery to repair the damage.

The bad news – Brian Dumoulin played like shit this postseason. The reason? Well, *hot take alert* I’m sure playing on a significant knee injury probably doesn’t feel very good and inhibits your skating ability.

But Dumoulin isn’t the only one to blame for his poor play this postseason. In fact, the rest of the defense sucked as well:

Screen Shot 2019-04-18 at 9.44.42 PM.png

(Shoutout to me for using a graph for once.)

  • Jared McCann – Separated AC Joint (i.e. separated shoulder) 

According to the Mayo Clinic, a separated shoulder is “an injury to the ligaments that hold your collarbone (clavicle) to your shoulder blade. In a mild separated shoulder, the ligaments might just be stretched. In severe injuries, ligaments might be torn. In most people, a separated shoulder doesn’t usually require surgery. Instead, conservative treatment — such as rest, ice and pain relievers — is often enough to relieve the pain. Most people regain full shoulder function within a few weeks after having a separated shoulder.”

So from the sounds of things (considering that McCann only missed one game of action), it appears his separated shoulder fell within the “mild” category.

The good news – he wore an awesome hat today at cleanout day.

The bad news – he had one point in three games this postseason.

  • Bryan Rust – Foot/Ankle?

Rust apparently didn’t elaborate on the specifics of the injury, but our friends over at Pensburgh reported back in February that he was seen borrowing one of Big Ben’s walking boots after the Stadium Series game in Philly.

No word yet on whether or not any of Rust’s teammates threw a puck at his skates during a practice during the tail end of the season.

  • Evgeni Malkin?

Malkin either didn’t show up to cleanout day today or he *gasp* didn’t speak to the media. I’m going to assume it was the former considering some dickhead journalist would have written a column about it by now if he didn’t speak to he or she. Guaranteed he hurt his ribs back in March, though.

  • Honorable Mentions

General Manager Jim Rutherford – possible brain injury

Legit no idea how a human being that gets paid for making hockey personnel decisions for a living at the professional level can say such a stupid thing.

G wrote about it extensively today. Give it a read.

Penguins Reporter – bruised ego

The video is worth the watch:

There’s absolutely no coming back from that. Ts and Ps to him.

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And that’s it for this year. Hopefully next year’s edition doesn’t come out in goddamn April.

P.S. – Big thank you to Sean Gentille’s service at cleanout day today:

Now, that’s what I call #access.

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Yinz have a great summer.

@PeepsBurgh

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